As I Throw Pennies

I often wonder what the heck it is I’m doing
Accepting tides, shedding skins, marbles and sand
Periodic patterns of sunder in surf
Its so deceiving to stare at the sun
Narrowing vision to untangle skeins
Still I vie with myself through doubtful tools
But no one better than myself to seek with
I don’t desire to understand this universe
I marvel at all it takes and all it gives
I long for a deeper friend through me and it
Discovery is only a means to divine singularity
I cry in tears as pain returns, and it always does
I see the world truly uniquely just like you do
Deep in thought I immortalize what I create
All I am and all that bewilders my limits
As I get older I figure out what makes me happy
While this humanity keeps me further from it
Perhaps insanity will win out when it all converges
I’m still a ways from the fountain to be making wishes

The Road to Her

It’s far too easy to become lost
Inside a stream of routine
The bedsheets of familiarity

I have but one real desire this time
To seek truth, find truth, and be it

One a day like today
But how much can change
In the blink of an ebb
So quickly it sighs

Tomorrow is taken from some of us
In moments like these we’re reminded
How granted we take things for

I won’t stroke egos or pacify judgments
I am here, now, ready, and willing

I’m not afraid
I repeat it again
I am not afraid
Though still in pain

“Snap out of it.” That’s all I can muster.
What will it take for my gratitude to show?
Looking life in the face and smiling

The road to hurt has kept me at bay
The road to her, it has found a way

I’m standing tall
Learning to laugh
Kissing my fear
Until it heals

Uncertainty Principles

There is so much we all expect to shed
But our poetic memory cannot undo the past
Memory only ever becomes buried and hardens
In blinking moments, dredged to the surface

I know that freedom is a life worth having
An encompassing joy indeed worth sharing
There is much that I could give freely
Like a middle aged sun with many years left

We all want more than we can ever attain
Even wanting less becomes unattainable
Our jealous desire for the future now
Unhappy with things as they are

To practice my patience daily!
Oh what patience that requires my being
Exhaustion as cyclical as it is inevitable
Sparing no one in it’s sweeping wake

I’ve had to let go of so much to find truth
Unbearably light now, I see maybe too much
With my tail between my legs I am tempted
Recalling simpler, more painfully fake times

My authenticity means too much to me
So I praise and curse it’s name at an apex
Wild, passionate, chaotic and free
I still have far too much to learn it seems

Words for Fire

Sit there on a sleeping stairwell
Spiraled around itself
Limn anew within your mad mind
With kindling collected

If you don’t answer what you want
Under the light of harvest moon
Scripts become adopted in woe
It’s decided for you

The woe and the weeping won’t budge
Poison always reveals
Right when there’s nothing more to leech
You’ll remember your way

Sometimes we suffer in silence
Unnecessarily
But we all long to define “I”
Just in our own hour

Commit to opportunity
This moment is for you
Plant your seeds with sunlight rising
Be brave and reap yourself

C

I lay down on crispy grass
My head tilted back to stare
The stars are drowned by lamps
The city consuming our universe

As I gaze with my eyes and reach
You’ve retreated for a few days
You can see the starlight now
Caressing the sky you sit under

Traveling aeons to reach you
Light undulates across an epoch
Only to fail at the sky of mine
Lamp lighted beyond recognition

But your sky is a country sky
Devoid of all distractions
Romanticizing your night-blanket
Threaded with this mucro light

We are under the same starry sky
Though mine wears a starless veil
I will become like light and traverse
Transcend space and time to you

Yak Yak Yak

Today I feel a loquacious logorrhea, that is:
A long-winded wordiness,
A vernacular verbosity of vocabulary,
Or a plentiful profusion; a prolixity of prose
Luscious language languishing my listening laconically
A flap-jawed jibber-jabber gushing with a gabbiness
I feel it magnanimous to be prattling on again
Affording no abeyance or abstinence of adjectives
Nary a nullification of noun
Showing no self-restrain, selectivity, suppression, or silence
Talkative tendencies tearing through to be taken in
We all have parables we are unable to table
Stories and allegories in all sorts of categories
Choosing chattiness today over having hearing
Today it feels like sharing is caring
Forcibly, not furtively, is fine
Preferable to apologize after
Than to ask permission prior
Damn the dam I say!
Force a flood for once to feel fervor
Vim, vigor, and vitality via verbiage

Unified Field Theory

If I were to hate you
Seething, red, green, purple
The only injustice committed
Inflicted, or otherwise
It’s upon myself
Something directed, projected
Lands on you but eats me
Self-mutilation masked
In truth we are brothers
Sharing a virtue no one else does
It should unify us
Healing us like hovering hands
After all, God is Love
But we’re divided by expectation
Ones you can’t let go from
That I’ve long since stopped holding
I want you to heal
But the choice has always been yours
So leave my love in peace
A star to call your own